Such a cute story. I love these, family groups and what comes of them sometimes. I, as your friend, did not know of Holy Cow. I had heard it be just took it as words of surprise. Apparently, the first born of a cow or other beast according to scriptures is Holy. The content was excellent and the writing was clear, and easy to follow. Thank you for the picture, and where Holy Cow came from. Keep writing.
Great Acrostic. I loved it. It flowed nicely and no 'hiccups'. I feel you describing Gods love in a few different ways. Very encouraging, trying to get everyday better that the last. I enjoyed this and the picture it drew. Very good job. Thank you for the journey. May your days be filled with creativity.
Oh to be as a wolf. How cool would that be. I can see a friend of the wolf. I feel the love for the animal and its ways. We all find a closeness to animals, I am feeling that the wolf may have been injured. But the loneliness of the wolf, reflects how we feel at time. Beautiful poem. I loved. Was a little hard to discern but that's on me. I haven't had coffee yet. Thank you for the journey.
Such a wonderful intriguing story. I loved it. I was worried about not knowing about water polo, but that was easy part. I could picture him strutting into the gym and setting down on the bench. His hair collecting views and comments from everyone. I loved the content, story very well told. Technically I see nothing wrong. Nice big font and easy to read. If I were to do anything it would be to break out the dialog so each piece be on its own line. Much easier to follow that way. Keep on writing. And thank you for the journey.
Very neat little poem. Straight to the point. Sun setting as ending to many things in life. Been there many, many times. Nice free verse, very easy to follow and understand quite clearly. Try an opposite with Sunrise being beginnings. Good job. I enjoyed reading this and the journey it takes you on. Keep writing.
Neat little essay. Could make that a free verse even. Good content, I often wondered what those last few moments maybe like. I only pray I am asleep when it actually occurs. There is always reason to question how we have used our life. To many it probably is never enough. Thank you for showing me a bit of your soul. Interesting thoughts. I enjoyed the journey. Keep writing.
Such a wonderful letter. You do a lot for us, and I personally appreciate all. You are inspiring. Reading this I had to laugh a little, I could picture you setting there typing away, talking to a little person on your shoulder, trying to point out the bad stuff. And on the other shoulder a little person whispering how good your doing in your other ear. Fantastic. I love it. You have done a good job. Loved the letter. Good luck and keep writing!
Good job paraphrasing. Macbeth is not an easy one for paraphrasing. You did an excellent job making a poem of it. Stretching out from a comfort zone is always a learning experience. Good job. It reads well, and the flow is good. I enjoyed the journey. Thank you. Keep on writing.
OMG, this little jewel had me laughing I almost woke up the wife. One side of a conversation to remove bats from attic. The description with noise and their machines using your electricity. This was awesome. I could find no real issues with it. The content kept me laughing. Gas the bats? So cool. Thank you for sharing. Keep on writing.
I have been seeing this often lately. Such a good start to a story. Then it stops. Please continue. This has great potential and such a good starting point. Technically it is all sound. The content is ripe for exploration. I enjoyed those 5 paragraphs, left me hanging for more. Keep on writing.
Nice free verse poem. Flowed nicely and very easy to follow and understand. The content was interesting. Death comes to us all sooner or later. Hope is all we have to continue sometimes. Sometimes we do grow cold with life, don't feel anything for it. Those days is when our hope kicks in. Good job. Nicely written and no issues jump out. Thank you for the journey. Keep on writing.
Maybe I'm to old but I really don't totally understand this. But I will try. I take its two young dragons and discussing coming of age. I like the descriptions and the premise if thats what you were trying for. I would break it up with the dialog being seperate lines which makes it stand out and easier to read and follow. But keep writing, getting it down first then take suggestions and rework it. Keep on writing, its growing. Just like Stormfly.
Good story premise. I enjoyed following it. And it has very good potential. There are a few places where you should proof read it again. But overall a very good start to an interesting short story. Good on you! Stepping out of our comfort zone is part of getting better. Thank you for the journey, I enjoyed it. Keep on writing.
Great poem. Easy to follow, and flow was nice and even. Not sure about plan and planed.. think it should be planned. But all else is wonderful. I can see how storms affected you. And looking up knowing He has all control it still worries us sometimes. Its human nature. I love the poem and read your bio as well. Impressive. Thank you for sharing, I enjoyed the journey.
You learn alot reading a persons writings. This was very well written. I enjoyed reading it and it was easy to follow. I see one that gets ready to paint but there mind isn't ready yet. It still has to give the tree some life, so the painter uses her life. Interesting point of view. I enjoyed the journey and seem to know and understand a tiny bit more of you. Keep on writing.
Love the poem. I understand where you comeing from. Delivering morning newpapers as a teen, we were always seeing Shadow People. Poem flowed nicely and the content was excellent. Brought back memories of those cold dark mornings I was passing papers. Thank you for the journey. Keep on writing.
I love it. Message to self. Setting goals with a check list is great! And works so well. I agree small goals will add up as you go. Time is a great healer. Nice size and easy to read. Small goals let you look back and see accomplishment, in itself that is inspiring. Hang in and keep writing. Thank you for the journey.
Cute little poem. I feel this is a teen, and the time at 3am. I can see you thinking about her or a loved one and knowing its toxic for you. This is just my feel on this, but as for the free verse, well done. Its concise and to the point. Good job. Keep on writing.
Absolutely Awesome! I loved that dialog. Was so easy to follow and allowed a moment or two to visual the conversation. Such an impressive job with dialog. Very clear who was speaking. Fish allergic to water. Loved the twist. Thank you for the journey. I really enjoyed reading this. Keep on writing.
Great idea. Very good and promising premise for a story. I enjoyed it. The twist at the end, give thought of a werewolf maybe. Or at least something that needs the Moon to come to fruitation. Would be great inside flap for the story. Hope to see more of it. Keep writing.
May your day be filled with creativity.
Nice little poem. Very easy to follow and content was interesting. We have to have hope and she thought the sky was filled with hope. Trying to pocket it, she wanted hope, a reason to continue. Very good job. I enjoyed the picture you painted. Keep on writing.
Interesting, this reads like the inside flap of a good story. Would love to see it wrote. You have a very good start here with excellent skills poking through. I enjoyed reading this and if it was a book flap I would probably purchase it. No technical issues, and content very clear and leading. I enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing.
Awesome story. A gem that reviewer look for. I loved it. I could see this as a childs book with illustrations. Good job, I didn't see any technical bumps. The content was very imaginative. A child discovers a hidden talent. And the end with moral explained was great! I enjoyed reading this, it had a smooth flow for a short story.
Thank you for sharing. Keep writing.
As a child we look at rainbows, magic to us. As adults we look at the clouds and rain and forget the beauty of a rainbow. Good poem, lots of depth could be garnered here. I enjoyed it, was very easy to follow and the content was clear and concise. Free verse is fairly easy to follow, and you have done well. Thank you for the journey, keep on writing.
Not fair, good story line being developed and it stops. Good job, few missed spelled words but the flow was nice and even. The story progressed very well and I enjoyed following it. Only thing I would change is the presentation, larger font, more spacing between lines, makes so mobile people can read it as well. Great job, hope there is more lingering somewhere. Keep on writing, great journey. May your days be filled with creativity.
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