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Review of Unfolding Self  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your poem beautifully uses the metaphor of a book to describe your journey of self-discovery. Here’s a more detailed review:

Metaphor and Imagery:

The metaphor of seeing oneself as a book is compelling. It allows readers to easily understand the complexity of a person's life, with its different chapters and pages representing various experiences and memories.
The imagery of "favorite chapters" and "pages...I no longer want to re-read" is vivid. It conveys the idea that some memories are cherished while others are painful or best forgotten.
Themes and Emotions:

Acceptance and Self-Awareness: The poem reflects a deep understanding of oneself, acknowledging both the positive and negative parts of life.
Resilience: There's an underlying theme of resilience, as you mention continuing to discover yourself despite the parts you'd rather forget.
Individuality: You emphasize the uniqueness of your story and the importance of living your own narrative, which adds a personal and relatable touch.
Structure and Flow:

The free verse structure works well for this type of reflective poetry. It allows for a natural flow of thoughts and emotions.
The repetition of certain phrases, like "I have" and "I am," reinforces the introspective tone and gives the poem a rhythm, even without a strict rhyme scheme.
Language and Tone:

The language is straightforward yet evocative, making it accessible while still being profound.
The tone is contemplative and introspective, which suits the theme of self-discovery and personal growth.
Suggestions for Improvement:

Consistency in Tense and Pronouns: The shift from "I" to "a like anybody else" could be smoother. Consider changing "a like anybody else" to "like anyone else" for grammatical consistency.
Polishing Phrasing: The line "I badly desire to just tear down and be forgotten" could be refined for clarity. Perhaps, "that I desperately wish I could tear out and forget" would maintain the intensity while being clearer.
Conclusion: The final lines affirming the value of your own story are powerful. Ensure they stand out by perhaps adding a pause or break before them, making them a distinct, impactful ending.
Overall, your poem is a heartfelt and insightful piece that effectively uses metaphor and imagery to convey the complexity of personal growth and self-acceptance. With a few minor adjustments, it can become even more polished and impactful. Keep writing and exploring your unique narrative!

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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for entry "Maryann's Monkey" Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Your story, "Mighty Maryann, mistress of Marvel Mango Milkshake Makers," is fun and whimsical. Here are a few points to consider to make it even better:

Strengths:
Alliteration: Your use of alliteration is impressive and adds a playful rhythm to the story. It gives a unique flavor that fits the light-hearted tone.
Humor: The humor in the narrative, especially the playful conflict between Monkey and Jolly Jim, keeps the story entertaining.
Character Names: The names are memorable and add to the story’s charm. Maryann, the Monkey, and Jolly Jim are all vivid characters that contribute to the whimsical setting.
Areas for Improvement:
Clarity and Flow: While the alliteration is engaging, it occasionally makes the story hard to follow. Simplifying some sentences without losing the playful tone could help. For example, "Mighty Maryann, mistress of Marvel Mango Milkshake Makers, managed menu mischief all Monday morning" is great, but "Maryann's meandering Monkey made mistakes" could be clearer as "Maryann's Monkey made mistakes by missing messages and messing up ingredients."
Character Development: Adding a bit more detail about Maryann and the Monkey could help readers connect with them. Why is the Monkey making mistakes? Is he new to the job or just having a bad day?
Resolution: The ending feels a bit rushed. The transition from conflict to resolution could be smoother. Maybe show a bit more interaction between Maryann, the Monkey, and Jolly Jim before the apology.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Strange Love  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your writing captures the complexity of love in a thoughtful way, highlighting the uniqueness of loving someone despite their flaws and unconventional traits. Here are a few suggestions to enhance clarity and flow:

Original: It's strange that you still love someone eventhough she has flaws.

Revised: It's strange that you still love someone even though she has flaws.

Original: Unusually, you love someone who is considered unconventional.

Revised: It's unusual to love someone who is considered unconventional.

Original: Remarkably, you love someone who has an empty heart or perhaps a barren land where flowers no longer bloom.

Revised: Remarkably, you love someone with an empty heart, like a barren land where flowers no longer bloom.

Original: It's extraordinary that you love someone opposite to you.

Revised: It's extraordinary to love someone who is opposite to you.

Original: It's peculiar that you love someone who, is judged by others' standards.

Revised: It's peculiar to love someone judged by others' standards.

Original: Intriguingly, you love someone who embodies both introversion and extroversion.

Revised: Intriguingly, you love someone who embodies both introversion and extroversion.

Your descriptions effectively convey the paradoxes and challenges of love, emphasizing its depth and resilience. By refining some of the sentences, the message becomes even clearer and more impactful. Keep focusing on these unique contrasts and your writing will continue to engage and resonate with readers.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your poem beautifully captures the profound sacrifice and the significance of Jesus Christ's crucifixion and birth. It weaves together the stark reality of His suffering and the spiritual hope that His sacrifice brings to believers. Here are some thoughts on your work:

Emotional Depth: The imagery of Christ on the cross is powerful and evokes a strong emotional response. Words like "bludgeoned," "berated," "vicious," and "agonizing" effectively convey the intensity of His suffering. This draws the reader into the gravity of the moment and the ultimate sacrifice made for humanity.

Spiritual Reflection: The poem transitions from the crucifixion to the broader spiritual context of Christ's role in salvation. By mentioning "Our Holy Father’s decision" and "enter His forever-resplendent kingdom," you emphasize the theological significance of these events. This reflection on divine purpose helps ground the narrative in its religious context.

Contrast of Events: Juxtaposing the agonizing defeat on the cross with the joyful celebration of Christmas creates a powerful contrast. This highlights the full spectrum of Christ's life and mission—from His humble birth to His sacrificial death. It underscores the importance of both events in Christian faith.

Celebration of Christmas: The latter part of the poem shifts to the joyous celebration of Christ’s birth. Describing Christmas as a time of "wondrous passion" and "enlightened respect" brings a sense of warmth and reverence. This balances the earlier somber tone and reminds readers of the hope and love that Christ's birth symbolizes.

Language and Style: The language used is both poetic and accessible, making the themes relatable while maintaining a respectful tone. The choice of words and the flow of the poem maintain a reverent and contemplative mood, suitable for the subject matter.

Overall, your poem effectively captures the dual nature of Christ's story—the suffering and the joy, the sacrifice and the salvation. It's a reflective piece that invites readers to contemplate the depth of Christ's love and the significance of His life and death.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
"Red Bird in Snow" is a captivating tale that blends the serene beauty of a winter landscape with a poignant message about the consequences of our deepest desires. The narrative's simplicity makes it accessible, yet it carries a powerful twist that leaves a lasting impression.

The story begins with an elderly man walking through the snowy woods near his home, a setting that evokes a sense of calm and reflection. This tranquil scene is abruptly interrupted when he encounters a red bird stuck in a snowdrift. The old man's act of kindness in freeing the bird sets the stage for the unfolding magical events.

The red bird reveals itself to be magical, offering the man a single wish as a token of gratitude. The warning to be careful with wishes is a classic trope, preparing the reader for the twist to come. The man's wish to be with his wife forever is heartfelt and speaks to the universal desire for eternal love and companionship.

As the story progresses, the man returns home to share the extraordinary encounter with his wife. Their shared smile and the anticipation of the wish coming true create a warm, hopeful moment. However, the story takes a dark turn at midnight when the Grim Reaper arrives, accompanied by the red bird. This twist is both shocking and thought-provoking, as the man's wish is granted in an unexpected and literal manner.

The ending is powerful, illustrating the theme that wishes can have unintended consequences. The arrival of death for both the man and his wife underscores the finality and permanence of their togetherness, a bittersweet fulfillment of the man's wish.

Overall, "Red Bird in Snow" is a well-crafted story with a strong emotional impact. Its concise narrative and effective use of a plot twist make it memorable. The story encourages readers to reflect on the nature of their desires and the potential costs of getting what they wish for.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of A Life Lived  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Born in a hospital,
my life began in 1984.
What have I done since then?
It is now 2024.

Raised to be a kind man,
I learned much from my mother.
Raised to be a strong man,
I learned much from my father.

Forty years have passed,
and I'm still learning a lot.
The more I learn, the more I see,
that life is all we've got.

Life continues not matter what,
Nineties films had influence.
But death is always there.
A reminder of consequence.

Still, I continue,
In hope that one day
My child will succeed,
And have his say.

Life is meaning.
Purpose with skill.
And it harm no one,
Do what you will.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem beautifully explores the theme of a harmonious and spiritual relationship. It reflects a deep bond between the two characters, symbolized as a prince and his princess, who share not only love but also cherished values and intentions.

The poem opens with a sense of unity and shared experiences, emphasizing the importance of mementos and values. This sets a warm, intimate tone that carries throughout the piece. The use of "innate flows," "auspice," and "clarity" adds a sense of naturalness and purity to their relationship.

The middle stanzas highlight the strength and endurance of their friendship, describing it as a "joyful partnership" that thrives even against challenging elements. The phrase "blessed harmonies" evokes a sense of divine blessing, further emphasized by their shared faith in God.

The poem then transitions into a more spiritual dimension, illustrating how their relationship is grounded in their faith and trust in Jesus. The imagery of "soaring above the glitter and shine" suggests that their connection transcends superficial attractions, aiming for a higher, more meaningful bond.

The concluding lines focus on the alignment of their purpose with divine will, portraying a future filled with unity and peace. This ending reinforces the spiritual depth of their relationship, suggesting that their love is not only personal but also part of a larger, divine plan.

Overall, the poem is heartfelt and sincere, capturing the essence of a deeply spiritual and enduring relationship. It effectively combines themes of love, friendship, faith, and divine purpose, making it a touching tribute to the bond between the prince and his princess.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This short piece has a strong emotional core, capturing a moment of intense connection and passion between two people. It’s evocative and paints a vivid picture of their love. Here are some thoughts and suggestions to enhance its clarity and impact:

Grammar and Punctuation:

The first line has a small grammatical error. "each others eyes" should be "each other's eyes".
The punctuation could be improved to make the flow smoother. Consider breaking some lines into shorter sentences for better readability.
Imagery and Clarity:

The imagery is strong, but some phrases can be made more precise. For example, "pierced their hearts" could be more specific about what they are feeling.
"nourishing the souls within" is a lovely phrase, but it can be expanded to clarify how their connection nourishes them.
Consistency:

Ensure the tense and narrative style remain consistent throughout. For example, "they touched" could be "as they touched" to maintain the parallel structure.
Word Choice:

Some words and phrases might be simplified for greater impact. "Upwards ascension" could just be "ascent" or "rise".
Here's a revised version with these points in mind:

As both held the other tightly,
peering deeply into each other's eyes,
no one else mattered.
Their hearts were pierced,
nourishing the souls within.

They felt the intense burning of
passion enveloping their very beings
as they touched. In climbing the next rung
of their ascent
to perfect love.

This is their
never-ending journey
throughout time.

This revision maintains the original sentiment while improving readability and clarity. It strengthens the imagery and flow, making the emotional connection more palpable.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Marilyn Mackenzie's piece "One Small Word Makes All The Difference" offers a refreshing perspective on how our choice of words shapes our mindset and attitude. The essay begins with a thought-provoking quote from Helen Keller, emphasizing the importance of optimism in discovering and achieving great things.

Mackenzie uses a relatable scenario to drive her point home. She talks about how we commonly refer to a traffic signal as a "stop light," despite it having three functions: to stop, to caution, and to go. This choice of words, she argues, highlights our tendency to focus on the negative aspect of situations. By referring to it as a "stop light," we ignore the positive and progressive aspects symbolized by the green and yellow lights.

The story of her interactions with her young son during car rides adds a charming and personal touch to her argument. When the light turned red, they would make up songs together, transforming what is usually seen as a frustrating moment into a fun and memorable experience. This anecdote beautifully illustrates how a simple shift in perspective can turn a seemingly negative situation into a positive one.

Mackenzie proposes that we could just as easily call it a "traffic signal" or even a "go light," highlighting the more positive and proactive aspects of the device. This idea underscores a broader message: the words we use can significantly influence our outlook on life. By choosing more positive language, we can foster a more optimistic and resilient mindset.

In essence, the essay encourages readers to be mindful of their language and its impact on their perception. By focusing on the positive aspects of situations, we can change our experiences and outlook on life. Mackenzie’s simple yet powerful suggestion is a reminder that sometimes, one small word can indeed make all the difference in how we view and approach the world.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Let Go  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your story has a haunting and poetic quality that captures the reader's attention. Here are some thoughts and suggestions to enhance it:

Opening Sentences:

"He couldn't escape them. Those horrible twisted thoughts that the world had treated him unfairly." These lines are effective but could be tightened a bit for clarity and impact. Consider: "He couldn't escape those horrible, twisted thoughts of unfairness."
Imagery and Mood:

The imagery of staring into an abyss is strong. To heighten the mood, you might add more sensory details. For example: "He stared into the stomach-turning abyss, feeling its cold grip around his heart."
Descriptive Language:

Phrases like "wounded knee" and "bloodied knuckles" effectively convey his physical and emotional pain. You might elaborate slightly for a stronger visual: "With a wounded knee and bloodied knuckles, he beckoned, his voice raw with desperation."
Dialogue and Revelation:

The angel's message is profound and lyrical. To make it more impactful, consider breaking it into shorter lines for emphasis. For example:
"Glory be unto I and thus unto thee.
Nothing is troublesome in itself.
'Tis the loathing that makes it so.
Therefore, we ought to let it go."
Character's Transformation:

The protagonist's shift from despair to contentment is powerful. You capture this well in the scene where he returns to his hut. Adding a few more details about his surroundings or inner thoughts could deepen the reader's connection to his transformation.
Ending:

The ending is hopeful and ties the story together nicely. The final lines could be made more poignant by showing a brief moment of his new life. For instance: "The next day, he awoke to a summer morning, the likes of which he'd never witnessed. Birds sang, and the sun's warmth felt like a gentle embrace. And that's how it was for the bloke of no note."
Grammar and Style:

Watch for small grammatical issues like "couldnt" (should be "couldn't") and "'Twas" (consider if this fits the overall style or if "It was" would be more consistent).
Poetic Elements:

Your use of poetic language adds a unique touch. Ensure that it flows naturally within the narrative and doesn't disrupt the readability. Phrases like "heart of hearts" and "whence he came face to face" add a lyrical quality but should blend seamlessly with the rest of the prose.
Overall, your story effectively explores deep emotions and the journey from despair to enlightenment. With a few adjustments for clarity and detail, it can become even more compelling. Keep refining your poetic voice and imagery, and you'll continue to engage and move your readers.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Faith Healer  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Connie's tale is a captivating blend of mystery, magic, and faith woven seamlessly into the fabric of everyday life. Set against the backdrop of a Scottish countryside on Halloween night, the story follows Connie, a young woman with a deep connection to the natural world and a gift for herbalism.

The author skillfully paints a vivid picture of Connie's cozy home, complete with shelves of books and jars of herbs, and her faithful companion, Shadow the cat. The scene is rich in detail, evoking a sense of warmth and comfort despite the raging snowstorm outside.

As Connie prepares for bed, her thoughts are consumed by the Scottish tradition of hanging wet sheets to dream of one's future spouse. But her dreams take an unexpected turn when she is visited by the spirit of her late grandmother, who promises to guide her to her perfect match.

The arrival of Ryan, a desperate father seeking Connie's help for his sick daughter, sets the stage for a journey of healing and redemption. Despite Ryan's initial skepticism, Connie's steadfast faith and knowledge of herbal remedies prove to be a powerful force against the mysterious illness plaguing Talitha.

Through prayer, repentance, and the power of natural medicine, Connie and Ryan confront the darkness that threatens their lives and find hope in the promise of a brighter future. In the end, it is not only Talitha's physical health that is restored, but Ryan's faith and Connie's belief in the guiding hand of her grandmother's spirit.

The story is a testament to the enduring power of faith, love, and the healing properties of the natural world. With its richly drawn characters and evocative imagery, it transports the reader to a world where magic and miracles are found in the most unexpected places.


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This piece exudes an intense and romantic sentiment, capturing the essence of profound love and unwavering commitment. The language is rich with imagery and emotion, painting a vivid picture of a relationship characterized by pure affection and devotion.

The use of vivid imagery, such as "heaven’s colorful, starlit infinity," and "each other’s delicate, soothed, and compassionate eyes," adds depth to the portrayal of the lovers' connection, making it feel almost tangible to the reader.

The repetition of phrases like "whole-hearted love," "endless dedication," and "passionate commitment" emphasizes the depth of emotion and reinforces the central theme of unwavering devotion.

The juxtaposition of the pure love shared between the couple with the harsh realities of the world, described as "impurity, deception, and permissive distractions," creates a poignant contrast, highlighting the strength of their bond amidst adversity.

Overall, this piece effectively captures the beauty and power of love, offering a heartfelt portrayal of a relationship built on mutual respect, affection, and enduring hope for the future.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This ghazal titled "Haunting Memories" beautifully captures the essence of longing and reminiscence through its evocative verses. The repetitive structure, typical of a ghazal, emphasizes the theme of persistent memories that linger despite attempts to move on.

The use of the refrain "haunt" throughout the poem reinforces the idea of memories that refuse to fade away, haunting the speaker even in their dreams. This repetition creates a sense of rhythm and continuity, drawing the reader deeper into the emotional landscape of the poem.

The imagery of the speaker pleading for the return of their memories adds a poignant touch to the verses. Lines like "You are that keep me alive" and "Come soon and give me new life" convey a sense of desperation and yearning for the past. The mention of "sermon on the mont" adds a spiritual dimension to the poem, suggesting that the memories hold a significant, almost sacred, place in the speaker's life.

The closing couplet, with its plea not to deny the speaker their dreams, serves as a poignant conclusion to the poem. It encapsulates the central conflict of the speaker's desire to hold onto their memories while also acknowledging the pain they bring.

Overall, "Haunting Memories" is a poignant and beautifully crafted ghazal that effectively conveys the bittersweet nature of reminiscence and longing. The rhythmic structure, vivid imagery, and emotional depth make it a compelling read.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of I’m fine  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
ChatGPT
Strength, as pondered in this reflective piece, is portrayed not merely as physical resilience, but as the ability to confront challenges with composure, whether through stoic endurance or concealed vulnerability. The narrator grapples with societal expectations of strength, particularly as a young man of imposing stature. The pressure to maintain an unyielding facade, even when grappling with internal turmoil, is palpable. "I'm fine" becomes a reflexive shield, shielding vulnerability behind a veil of stoicism.

The narrative delves into the internal conflict between the perceived necessity of emotional suppression and the acknowledgment of human frailty. Despite the insistence on projecting an unassailable front, the protagonist acknowledges the tumult of emotions simmering beneath the surface. The struggle to reconcile societal norms with personal authenticity is evident, as the narrator questions the efficacy of vulnerability in a world that prizes invulnerability.

The piece prompts introspection on the nature of strength and vulnerability, challenging conventional notions of resilience. It highlights the toll of emotional suppression, as unresolved feelings threaten to erupt destructively. The narrator's internal dialogue underscores the complexity of navigating societal expectations while honoring one's emotional truth.

Ultimately, the narrative invites consideration of whether true strength lies in the ability to confront vulnerability, rather than in the maintenance of an impenetrable facade. It prompts readers to question the value of emotional honesty in fostering genuine connection and personal growth, challenging the cultural ideal of unwavering strength in the face of adversity.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
The story beautifully captures the essence of memories and the passage of time through the lens of an elderly man on a train journey. The author adeptly weaves together the old man's physical discomfort with his poignant reflections on his late wife, Marge, and their shared experiences.

The vivid descriptions of the train ride through the Rocky Mountains evoke a sense of nostalgia and longing, particularly through the imagery of the autumn breeze and the grove of golden Aspens. These elements serve as potent symbols of the couple's enduring love and the cherished moments they shared.

The narrative skillfully shifts between past and present, seamlessly blending the old man's reminiscences with his current surroundings. The mention of Marge's fondness for the train ride and her passion for nature adds depth to their relationship, painting a picture of a life filled with simple joys and enduring love.

The author's portrayal of the old man's inner thoughts and emotions is both tender and introspective, offering readers a glimpse into his profound sense of loss and longing. The scene where he remembers planting the Aspens with Marge, and later, his daughter's exuberance on the train, highlights the bittersweet nature of memory and the legacy of love passed down through generations.

Overall, the story is a poignant meditation on love, loss, and the enduring power of memories. It invites readers to reflect on their own experiences and the connections that shape their lives, leaving a lasting impression long after the final train whistle has faded away.
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Review of WHAT SHOULD I DO?  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
It's completely normal to feel confused and worried about the future, especially as you approach college. Many people experience similar feelings during their high school years. The prospect of studying abroad can be both exhilarating and daunting. The idea of starting a new life in a different country, away from family and friends, can stir up a mix of emotions.

Your self-talk of "if you're scared, then you have to do it" is both brave and empowering. It's a reminder that growth often comes from stepping outside of our comfort zones. Sharing your excitement and concerns with your older sister shows a bond of trust and support between you two.

Her encouragement to pursue your dreams and explore studying abroad is heartening. It's a sign of belief in your abilities and potential. Considering her suggestion to attend college in the same country but in a different city, where you can still pursue your desired study program while staying closer to home, is wise. It allows for a compromise that honors both your aspirations and family considerations.

Your nerves about seeking your parents' consent are understandable. It's natural to worry about their reaction, especially when it involves a significant life decision like studying in another city. However, with your sister's support and a clear plan in mind, you're taking steps towards realizing your goals.

Overall, your story reflects the common journey of navigating uncertainties and making important life choices. It's a testament to resilience and the willingness to pursue opportunities despite the challenges they may present. Trust in yourself and the support of your loved ones as you embark on this exciting chapter of your life.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Catch-22  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)

This piece delves into the frustrations of navigating bureaucratic systems, particularly when it comes to citizenship and voting. The use of rhyme and rhythm adds a playful yet pointed tone to the exploration of paradoxes and absurdities inherent in such processes.

The imagery of a "land of paradox" sets the stage for a narrative where logic seems to be at odds with itself. The idea of needing to be alive to cast a ballot, yet unable to become a citizen without first being able to vote, creates a sense of irony and frustration. This is further emphasized by phrases like "bureaucratic blight" and "logic-defying maze," which vividly depict the hurdles individuals face.

The poem captures the cyclical nature of bureaucratic challenges, where one requirement leads to another in an endless loop. Despite the desire to participate in democracy, individuals find themselves trapped in a system that seems designed to prevent their engagement.

The call to action at the end, symbolized by raising a fist in protest, adds a sense of hope and resilience to the narrative. It suggests that despite the absurdities and obstacles, there is still a determination to challenge the status quo and strive for a future where reason prevails.

Overall, this piece effectively communicates the frustrations and absurdities of bureaucratic processes through vivid imagery and a compelling narrative. It resonates with readers who have experienced similar challenges, while also inspiring them to advocate for change.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Love  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
In this concise yet poignant piece, the theme of love is explored through actions rather than words. The use of three synonymous terms - "love," "adore," and "affection" - sets the tone for the reader to delve into the depths of this emotion.

The focus then shifts to the specific example of caring for a mother, which adds a layer of relatability and emotional resonance. The act of forgiving her anger demonstrates a profound understanding of the complexities within familial relationships. It speaks to the resilience and depth of love, capable of enduring even in moments of conflict or difficulty.

The mention of overseeing her meds introduces a practical aspect to the caregiving role, highlighting the selflessness and responsibility involved. The phrase "Minutes joyfully sacrificed" encapsulates the essence of this dedication, portraying the sacrifices made out of love as not burdensome but rather a source of fulfillment and joy.

Overall, the structure of the Clarity Pyramid effectively captures the essence of love through its progression from broader concepts to specific actions, ultimately leaving a lasting impression on the reader.


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Review of Re Awakenings  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem seems to delve into the complexities of a relationship, perhaps one that's both intimate and challenging. The imagery of being "pretzeled in a chair" suggests a sense of entanglement or being twisted up in emotions or thoughts. The mention of Cummings could refer to the poet E.E. Cummings, known for his unconventional style and themes of love and individuality.

The repetition of "again" throughout the poem emphasizes a cyclical nature, suggesting that the experience being described is recurring or ongoing. This repetition adds to the sense of frustration or inevitability in the relationship dynamic.

The lines "you sneak up on my mind / and disguise yourself as an idea" convey a sense of invasion or infiltration as if the other person's presence or influence is pervasive and sometimes deceptive. The confusion expressed in the lines "Were they yours or mine? / it gets so confusing when we're this way" hints at a blurred sense of identity or ownership within the relationship.

The imagery of numbness and pins and needles adds a physical dimension to the emotional turmoil described in the poem. It suggests a feeling of discomfort or unease, as well as a sudden awakening or realization.

Overall, the poem captures the push and pull, the intimacy and frustration, and the sense of being intertwined with another person in a way that's both exhilarating and disorienting. The use of repetition, vivid imagery, and introspective tone effectively conveys the complexities of human connection and emotion.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of The Perfect Car  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
The poem "Solar cells on the roof" paints a vivid picture of a futuristic world where renewable energy has rendered fossil fuels obsolete. The imagery of solar cells on the roof suggests a shift towards sustainable energy sources, symbolizing a departure from environmentally harmful practices. The line "make fossil fuel obsolete" conveys a sense of progress and hope for a cleaner, greener future.

The image of a car floating above the ground, effortlessly ascending and descending from traffic lane to traffic lane, adds to the futuristic setting. This depiction of advanced transportation technology hints at a world where vehicles are powered by renewable energy sources or perhaps even levitation technology, further emphasizing the theme of environmental sustainability and technological advancement.

The poem's brevity is both a strength and a limitation. While the concise nature of the poem allows for quick comprehension and leaves a lasting impression, it also leaves room for interpretation. Some readers may appreciate the open-endedness, which encourages them to imagine their own interpretations of the futuristic world described in the poem. However, others may crave more detail and depth to fully immerse themselves in the setting and narrative.

Overall, "Solar cells on the roof" effectively captures the imagination with its vision of a future where renewable energy and advanced transportation technology have transformed society. It inspires reflection on the potential of renewable energy to reshape our world and prompts consideration of the actions needed to make this vision a reality.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of McCarthy Forever!  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
"McCarthy Forever!" is a whimsical and nostalgic tale that blends elements of Irish history and folklore with a touch of the supernatural. The story follows Julia, a character who has returned to An Daingean after over a century, reflecting on her past and contemplating her future.

The narrative is rich with imagery and atmosphere, evoking the sights and sounds of coastal Ireland. From the sea breeze to the pea soup-like clouds, the setting is vividly depicted, immersing the reader in Julia's world.

Julia's musings about her heritage and family history add depth to the story, particularly her desire to reclaim the Rock of Cashel from the O'Briens. This theme of ancestral pride and resilience resonates throughout the narrative, reinforcing the idea of the McCarthys as a resilient and secretive clan.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)

The blend of historical references, such as the potato blight and emigration to America, with fantastical elements like Julia's longevity and her connection to her great-granddaughter, creates an intriguing juxtaposition. It adds layers to the story, hinting at themes of legacy and the passage of time.

The use of dialect and colloquial language adds authenticity to the characters and setting, enhancing the reader's immersion in the story. It also contributes to the story's charm and whimsy, making it feel like a tale passed down through generations.

Overall, "McCarthy Forever!" is a delightful and imaginative story that celebrates Irish culture and heritage while weaving a compelling narrative of family, history, and the enduring spirit of the McCarthys.


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)

This piece provides an entertaining glimpse into the returns department of a retail store, where customers are returning a product called "Hair Gone No More" due to unexpected side effects. The narrative style is casual and conversational, making it easy to follow along with the various customer interactions.

The protagonist, who works in the returns department, shares amusing anecdotes about customers returning the product. Each interaction highlights the dissatisfaction and frustration of the customers who experienced adverse effects from using the product. From hair growing in unwanted places to acne and scalp burns, the customers' experiences with "Hair Gone No More" are comically disastrous.

The dialogue adds depth to the characters and humor to the story. It effectively conveys the customers' frustrations and the protagonist's bemusement at their complaints. The repetition of customers returning the same product with different issues adds to the humor and reinforces the ineffectiveness of the product.

Overall, this short story effectively combines humor and satire to explore the absurdity of consumer products and customer expectations. The casual writing style and relatable scenarios make it an enjoyable read. However, it could benefit from a bit more structure to enhance readability and flow. Nonetheless, it succeeds in delivering a light-hearted and entertaining narrative.


WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review of Odin (All-Father)  Open in new Window.
Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This piece is a sincere invocation to Odin, the All-Father of Norse mythology. It exudes a deep reverence and reliance on Odin's wisdom, guidance, and protection. The use of poetic language and imagery adds to the emotional intensity of the text, creating a powerful and evocative appeal.

The author's plea for Odin to watch over them, guide them through challenges, and grant them strength reflects a universal desire for support and resilience in the face of adversity. The invocation of Odin's ravens as messengers from Midgard and the mention of Geri and Freki, his wolves who consume the fallen, vividly illustrate the Norse mythological backdrop.

The author's request for Odin's intervention against deceit and treachery, as well as their plea for comfort in times of loneliness and suffering, resonates with themes of justice, protection, and solace.

The concluding homage to Odin, expressing gratitude for his presence and influence in the author's life, serves as a heartfelt tribute to the deity and reinforces the author's devotion to Norse mythology.

Overall, this piece effectively captures the fervor and reverence associated with invoking a deity for guidance and protection, while also highlighting the author's personal struggles and aspirations for strength and compassion.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This piece has an intriguing setup with Big Daddy's background and his encounters in Bangkok. The use of bolded words like "whisper," "typewriter," "pocket watch," and "blueberry muffins" adds a creative touch to the narrative. However, the story feels rushed, lacking depth in character development and exploration of emotions. The transition from Big Daddy's contemplation to his decision to end the affair with Maria Lee feels abrupt and could benefit from more build-up and internal conflict.

In terms of genre, this piece reads like a crime thriller or espionage novel, given Big Daddy's past as a CIA operative and his involvement in illicit activities. The setting in Bangkok adds to the exotic and mysterious atmosphere of the story.

Overall, while the bolded words add an interesting twist, the story could be enhanced by delving deeper into Big Daddy's character and emotions, as well as providing more context for his relationships and motivations.

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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Review by WriterRick Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your piece beautifully captures the metaphorical significance of a candle's flame as a symbol of hope in various contexts. The imagery you use effectively conveys the idea of hope being a guiding light in different situations.

The comparison of the candle's flame to the hope of air for a miner in the depths of a mine creates a vivid image of perseverance and optimism amidst challenging circumstances. Similarly, the depiction of a candle's light guiding a traveler through the winter wilderness evokes feelings of warmth and comfort in times of uncertainty.

The romantic scene with the couple enjoying a glass of Chardonnay by candlelight adds a touch of intimacy and tenderness to the narrative, showcasing how hope can also be found in moments of connection and love.

Furthermore, the imagery of a child's eyes lighting up with hope as they make a wish on a birthday cake encapsulates the innocence and joy associated with hopeful anticipation.

Lastly, the mention of candles being lit during a midnight vigil portrays the collective power of hope in bringing people together in prayer and solidarity.

Overall, your piece effectively uses vivid imagery and metaphor to convey the theme of hope, making it a compelling and evocative read. Well done!

WriterRick (WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group)


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