Somewhere In Between

This is how I am feeling at the moment, a friend died this week, my sister last year.

Confusion really is an understatement
for what I now feel.
Somewhere in between youth and dreams,
Is it my ending?
Or my beginning?

Some might call it middle age - the upper end,
The prime of my life!
I'm speeding towards destiny,
My destination
as yet is unknown.

I believe in God, and even as a child
I knelt in prayer,
Church a stone building can crumble,
and the church people
can be deceptive.

I'm somewhere in between excitement and fear.
Thoughts of leaving hurt
my soul; but what is that exactly?
I wonder is it saved
for future journeys?