James's Birthday

Flash Fiction

James’s Birthday

“Get up!!! You’re going to be late for work.”

James bolted out from under the blankets. “What time is it?” he yelled.

“It’s late!” his wife, Mary, yelled, “You’ve usually left already! Get up! You can eat on the way. I’ll grab your lunch!”

James jumped up and flew into the bathroom. Turning on the shower and the sink at the same time. Then turning off the sink he jumped into the shower with his toothbrush instead, got every inch of himself wet as he brushed his teeth. He shook his body, and then he grabbed a towel getting out. A minute later his, still a bit damp, self was all dressed and pulling socks on.

At the last minute he glanced in the mirror and even through he couldn’t see much through the steam, he saw enough of his hair, and grabbed the comb, unsnarling it in seconds!

Finally, he grabbed his shoes and socks, and flew out of the bathroom, pulling the socks on after each step. Then remembering his wallet and keys, he flew back into the bedroom and grabbed them.

He finally made it to the kitchen! Mary was standing there, and so were about ten other people…

“Surprise” they all yelled, “Happy Birthday!”

James stood there in shock. “Ah…” he started, then looking at Mary, “It’s Saturday?”

“Yes Honey!” she said laughing, “It’s Saturday, Happy Birthday!” and everyone else yelled ‘Surprise’ and ‘Happy Birthday’ again as they all laughed.

James, however, fainted.

The story was told every year as James made it from his mid-twenties into his eighties. The kids, the grand kids, the friends and neighbors, all knew when it was James’s birthday.

James held up his part in the surprise, and never told anyone that he dreaded his birthday coming around…