Realization

Realizing you've grown up, but not in a good way.

When I was little I would countdown the day's til christmas.
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It would be exhilarating waiting for when id awake to gifts and holiday cheer all the way up until the very day.
Id lose sleep in anticipation, unable to calm my stomach and nerves.

Now I countdown the day I can leave, the day I can have my freedom
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When did it change?