Ambivalent

Confused feelings, high, then low as I go to therapy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Awash in eagerness, I schedule a meeting,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~My mind is full, though clarity is fleeting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Between the car and office the shift ensues,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I feel the weight of fear in my shoes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~Cloaked in shame each step I Vacillate,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Can I succeed this time to Articulate?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~Molded by messages I have Learned,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Attention, affection must be Earned.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~New patterns of thought I try to assimilate.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Trust, in the process of growth, I will imitate.