The Question

4of16 of a poem series I wrote in the perspective of a friend who committed suicide

Though I should not question what be,
I wonder what she sees in me.
I wonder why she loves me so
never a doubt does she ever show.

I wonder why our love doth persist.
Countless times the answer I have missed.
What from me does she desire?
She says love but I call her liar.

I cannot what is due to her give.
She says all she wants is me to live
she says she wants me by her side
she wants to in me her secrets bide
but I can't believe that's all she wants
and for the answer I shall hunt.

I shall search all the night and day
I shall persist to keep sleep at bay.
Even when she lies a'dreaming
this question shall hold my heart screaming
To discover where the answer lies
even until the day I die.