Portraits

Depressing look on a past life, to realize how many times we've died.

It reminds me of our portrait
Those smiles resembled purity
Locked as if we couldn’t move
our happiness shall forever be frozen in time

if only things could be like those days
back then things were simple and calm
now I feel as if it’s all spinning
and this is what pains my heart even more

If only I wasn’t conceited, regretful, vain…
Vengeful.
Cocky.
Nostalgic.
Day-dreamy.
Sympathetic.
Delusional.
Completely blinded.
Alone.

If only I was like the me back then
The me who lived without being caged
The me who breathed air instead of poison
The me who was once youthful
And not plotting my own demise.

My living in peace.
It reminds me of our portrait.