God, this is sad. Perfect. I don't have a single suggestion to make this better, because it is one of (if not THE) best writing pieces I think I have ever read. Don't stop. (And please, if this is you, please don't hesitate to tell someone! I'm not a therapist and can't really help further than that, but you're welcome to vent to me!)
This makes me want to cry. The way you also mention how your mom is manipulating you makes it perfect, and I wish I could relate to this more. 10/10, keep it up!