This is really great. One suggestion, however, would to work with the imigary you almost create. There are some powerful words that really add not only to the rhythem of the poem, but to its complexity as well. Your first stanza has excellent imagery and I would reccomend trying to mess around with some of the others. Specifically the third one. Use the "like beacons to the forlorn" simile to your advantage.
Great poem!
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