Killing The Hurt With Laughter

Can you tell the difference between pain and joy?

Pain.
Gnaws at my stomach.
Claws at my brain.

makes me want to cry
makes me want to die
but that would be giving up
so I take a deep breath,
and I laugh

You poison my heart
with the hatred you depart
but I refuse to be weak,
I refuse to give up
what you seek,
and so,
I laugh

I've been hurt by you
only mentally;
that's not new.
you terrify me.
you torment me.
you want to destroy,
that which is me;
but I only laugh.

I laugh
to prove you wrong
because I'm too stubborn
to cry

I laugh
to kill the pain
that gnaws at my stomach
and claws at my brain

I laugh
to the world,
my sorrow buried inside,
even though with each smile,
there is yet another pain to hide.

Amazing how people turn
when they hear someone laugh

they never even guess

that the laughter
everyone loves to hear
is the stubborn child's way

to cry.