Relentless Spirit

The turning point in my life.

Let us turn out the lights
Begin the journey back to each other
Which chapter will we choose to re-enter?
Let’s start at the very beginning, back in 2011

“Will you take this golden retriever we have, who desperately needs a home? We can have her here by lunchtime tomorrow”
“Oh, I was thinking a little black lab, but ok then, why not, what’s the difference?”

Little did I know how my life would change
How little did I know that you were the gift that I so desperately needed.
You saved my life.
You brought me hope.
Gave me purpose.
A reason to get out of bed in the mornings
You would have it no other way.
We had work to do, you and I.
We were going to learn together.
Boy, were we going to learn.

You were a whirling dervish with no stop button and barely even a pause.
From the moment your eyes opened in the mornings, to the time you were put to crate at night, you never stopped.
I had no moments to be sad, to live a day through sorrow, weakness, despair and suicidal thoughts.
That all began to wash away without me really being aware.

Your refusal to eat was a strange puzzle to me. What dog doesn’t want to eat?
Meal times were a never-ending fight
But your energy knew no bounds, so I had to assume you were alright.

Your relentless spirit to never stop
From jumping on the couch to chewing on your toy bucket, toys be damned
Shredding the stuffies until that squeaker was found and then discarding like a goal had been reached
To ripping the information tags from under our dining room chairs that we had no idea were there till you came along
To no longer having a nice coffee table to rest our remote controls on, our weekly tv guide, coasters and such
Oh no, these had to all be placed in a black storage container with a snap lock lid
This stopped you, you little wrecking ball.
However, there were teeth marks upon said storage container.

Your toileting atrocious from too long in the nursery
Endless accidents to clean
Not to mention how we needed to work on not eating one’s own eliminations

Training, day in, day out.
Intro to shopping centres. How fun this would be, until you dropped a massive pee.
Barking wildly while waiting with hubby while I did the groceries and me thinking “who has brought a dog into the shopping centre?” oh shit, that’s me
Nothing fazed you though. Not the sounds, not the smells, not the crowds.
You admired yourself in the shop window reflections, the bum would swish letting everyone know you were “Miss Thang” to be admired, fawned over, and you got what you wanted
“Oh my God, she’s so beautiful” they would say
If only they knew the devil underneath
Travelators can be scary. Really,? what’s the big deal?, you step on, you step off, so what.?
Let’s sit and settle, have a coffee while you chill.
Who the hell wants to chill? I’ll go down when you ask me to but don’t think I’m staying down, how boring!

We had work to do, you and I. Your destiny was to be a guide dog and we needed to get cracking as you were already behind the 8 ball being so long on your journey to get to me

Our first group class had me wondering what the hell I had gotten myself into. Why were all the others seemingly perfect while you had your own agenda. Listen to me be damned, I’ll do what I want, I’ll show them who’s boss. So embarrassing.
Crying all the way home. Feeling like an absolute failure. And that was not the last time either you little toad.

But that’s the thing. You waited for me. You were meant to come to me, there is no doubt in my mind that the stars were waiting for us to align, and they did.

My life started over that day, in 2011.
This great ball of gorgeous fluff, look deceiving, you were terror on four legs.
But I would not change a single day with you. Not one.
We became a team. One of head strong determination and the other out of her mind with frustration and adoration all at the same time.

Not to mention love. Love of my life.

The light will come soon. And we will part again but for a short time.
We have many nights ahead and many memories to share. This is just the beginning, never to end.