-Weighed Down- (By Ahlife Beconds)

The absent pieces of your soul sure do get heavy, don't they?

REASONING BEHIND THE POEM ▶︎

This poem is about medication and how it affected me, even after 3 years without it. Currently, I take medication for ADHD. You might be thinking "Well, that's not so bad.", but trust me, it is. I used to be required to take 3 or 4 pills every day and night. That's about 6 or 8 pills a day. I've been prescribed pills for anxiety, ADHD, and insomnia. I've been prescribed pills for conditions I don't even have. Bipolar disorder is one of them. Now you may be thinking, "It can't be healthy for a 11 year old to be taking 8 pills a day?". You're right, it's not. In fact, all the pills did was make it worse. Now, even three years after being taken off the pills, I still feel they're effect. My anxiety spikes to unnatural levels every time someone looks my way: "Are they looking at me? Did I do something wrong?" My insomnia keeps me up for 3-4 days on average: "Will the headaches ever stop?" My ADHD made my A and B honor roll drop down to straight F's and D's in 6th grade, but now that condition has been maintained by more medication. The effects of the medication destroyed parts of me that I can never get back. I'll never be whole. I'll always have these chains dragging behind me. I'll always be expected to function as a normal human being even when I don't feel human. There will always be an abyss in my heart. Those stolen pieces will never be recovered.

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-Weighed Down-
(By Ahlife Beconds)

Held down by chains
My heart struggles to be
I'm always told
It's just a little piece of me

Move on without it
It won't hold you back
Just a splintered soul
Don't look back

How could I be expected to walk
When part of me is chained to the ground
How could I even talk
When those pieces are lost and never found