Easy to Assemble

A flippant look at an occasionally daunting task

"Easy to assemble"
were writ in the instructions,
words that made me tremble
as they foretold my destruction.

A simple gift for my boy
with blazing colors on the box,
a wonderful and thoughtful toy
I should have tossed it on the rocks

The first hour I did try to read
the not so simple steps I faced
2 days is what I am going to need
to complete this job with expletives laced

To the basement I sneak and go
To protect his ears
and my ego

I lay it all out on the basement floor
and through step 5 I quickly breeze,
But then I can't find part X zero four
a part so small it could be gone with a sneeze.

I look under the rug and inside the vent
I lift up the table and upset the chair
what the heck it can't be but a cent
to replace it so what to I care

Oh, well says I 'tis plain to see
the omission of this small little factor
Will probably enlighten me
on how well I build his character

It's that deceptive little trick
or perhaps I will just wait
for next year (oh I am so slick)
and let him assemble it in 2 minutes straight!