My addiction (2008)

When there's no one else to turn to; I know i'll always be able to turn to paper to listen

I thought this was over
I thought this was done
I also thought
the addiction was gone
the longing, again,
is rising
and taking control.
My thoughts still turn to suicide
the ideal way of getting out
i cant understand why
i hate myself
These dreams are taking over
and my head starts to hurt
I wont end this today
I have no where to go
My grip has loosened,
but i'm still in control
Thats the only pain I can control...