Conceived Sorrow

What would happen if you despised yourself? How would you live?

I am Sixteen
And my body has betrayed me.
The one I cannot live without
Is a Figment of my imagination?
Not real
How come my clothes
Look like bags on me
What if I die
Before I find love
And I’m left all alone
In the dark

I have to learn how to smile
So no one will catch on.
My room is my haven, my comfort zone.
But suppose the sun fades away
And we are left to chaos
At least
I wouldn’t have to see.
There is so much I want to do
Yet, I can’t move
And I’m left all alone
In the dark

My mask is firmly in place
See, there’s a smile on my face
Though I try to appeal to all my friends
It all goes wrong in the end.
Why do I have to be
The crutch
When I’m already broken
Oh look, there’s a crack
In my mask
And I'm left all alone
In the dark