I Need Those Paddle Things Stat

Comedic song of dealing with a quack of a doctor

I Need Those Paddle Things Stat
Entrance Verse:
Life can’t be scripted
And starred
There is never a for sure
As I never knew I got
Hit by that car

I remember a gurney
A man in blue and white
They sat me on a table and
He cried

Chorus:
I need those paddle things
Fast and stat
God take me now
I’m ready

Soliloquy Verse:
The quack didn’t kill me
And as I lay sitting up in bed
The lawyers come in and
Explain

Indubetably and undersigned
The third party has absconded
A device of importance to
The first party who requested
The investigation

What?!

Chorus:
He left his watch inside
Of me
Now I scream
Stop the ticking

SOLOS

Death Scene Verse:
The prick sued me
And I went to court
I lay there stunned
In my very best suit

I approached the bench
And was found guilty
My heart was a flutter
I dropped to the floor

The doctor cried out loud:
Is there a doctor in the house?
I hope I shit his watch  X2