Trade Jesus For The Badseed

One who left this life, my Badseed.

  I ache for the times before these
            bloody gold compared
  A damn shameful mess
            in the way he chose
  No reason enough his fight used up
            bone dry
  Knowing this idea of goodness
            a magic shield against misery
                          to be a lie
  Yet having nothing else to cling too
            faith Did Not Save Jesus
  Nor The Badseed &
            ultimately this burns a hole
                      I cannot begin to heal
  Time being at best a blow
            to the head
                      my heart robbed raw
  Bad taste in my mouth &
            dead memories on my tongue
  I love you still but am afraid of
            gone forever - permanently
  I do not trust my heart to
            remember how it went &
                      everyone knows that
  Sleep is forgetting.