Current Feelings: 9th May

Just wanted to clear the thoughts in my head.

So many emotions running through my head;
Sadness, anger, hurt, happiness.
It’s all becoming too much.
I’m taking it out on the one person I shouldn’t,
And that’s not fair on him.

I’m sad that I almost lost the one person I care about.
It’s beginning to sink in.
Throughout the day I find myself thinking,
About the life that could have been.
But without that one person I care about,
There wouldn’t really be a life.
Struggling though each day,
A forced smile upon my face.

I’m angry with myself for being selfish.
For putting myself before that one person’s needs.
I expect them to jump when I say jump.
Before long, I’ll lose them, it seems.
I know I have to get over my issues.
I have to get over myself and think of someone else for a change.
It’s gunna be hard and difficult,
But it’s definitely for a good cause.

Yet, even though I’m feeling like this,
I’m feeling happy as well.
Eight months with a caring kid,
Who can put up with me,
No matter how much of a bitch I am.