If Blackbeard Was President

What if Blackbeard was President?

If Blackbeard was President
There'd be no sitting in the White House
Picking a gigantic booga

The only war would take place
Between two men fighting for a keg
In the drunken depths of Tortuga

If Blackbeard was President
No man or woman would go
Without kissin' or mackin'

Couples would get extra points
For reaching home base
In the stomach of the Krakken

Waves would always have motion
To the moans of a cutie

Because if Blackbeard was President
Every girl would get a little booty!