Just random feelings...put into poems

A emo SpurOf TheMoment poem I wrote for a close friend. She's my love-hate relationship.

How can you say you see me..
When you know you never will.
How can I admit that it's all my fault..
T'was my helping in the kill..
How can you say you're sorry..?
When you truly bless the deed..
How will I be of honor..?
When two have split their seed.
How can I be of loyalty?
When no one says it's wrong..
Maybe I've been dead to you..
Decaying all along..
How can I lay here? Write in peace?
While you're SCREAMING in my ear!
How do you expect my happiness..?
When you take all I hold dear..
How do I maintain sanity..?
As it's shattered by your never ending blow..
And if I just die within this hour..
To where would I actually go..?
How the hell do I confide in you..?
When it's you who spreads the hurt..
Always guarding my stoney heart..
ALWAYS on alert..
I doubt I shall ever be secure enough..
To give my love to one at all..
For if you keep shattering the floor beneath me..
All of my walls are sure to fall..

-Sar Written Nov. 3rd 06