Morbid Pride

This was when I was in a very dark place and time in my life.

Have you ever been disgusted

with the way you live

or who you are

or what you have done

you see only what is behind you

no future for you is in view.

Emasculating circumstances

obscure life anew

you feel like less of a person

but more importantly, less of a man

It has been said before

that a boy is not a man until he makes a stand

It means nothing to some

and everyting to more

to look back at your existance

and see a life that you abhor

Writing is my escape

but countless others have no hope

they find their only solstice

at the end of a looped rope

we have all had the thoughts

and entertained them with morbid pride

but too many of them I have known

they have taken that lonesome road

so if you wonder if you are alone

in your thoughts of self-hatred and oppression

there are at least one

who shares your emotional repression:

It is me.