Sick Again

I needed to get my words out today,thier my thought on my eating disorder.

I'm getting sick
because he wants me fit
I feel so fake
but he likes my shape.
Does he see,
what this does to me .
I hurt inside,
and it makes me cry.
knowing that this could make me die.
but i have to try
to please his eyes.
But is it worth my life
to remain beautiful in his mind?

Please e-mail me if you have any input or questions i will answer you with honesty and with as much knowledge as i can. I thank you sincerly.
Jessica