Hi writer

Congratulations on your account anniversary! I'm sending this review in honor of the occasion.


Positives

I liked the brief and poignant nature of these lyrics. I thought the imagery was well done and compelling. Nice work!


Suggestions

There were a few places where I think some clarity or revision is needed. The second line, for example, is missing an article. Should it be "A mark of a kiss" instead of "A mark of kiss"? Similarly, I think the "Want it constantly" line might be better phrased with a subject, such as "I want it constantly".


Overall

Overall, I think you're off to a good start here. A little polish is needed just to round the piece out a bit, but you're definitely off to a great start. Well done!


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Respectfully,

Jeff
"Rating & Reviewing Philosophy" 




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .