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 Review #4444029 |
 |  | Empty Vessel  [E] Will you apply the potter's message to your life today?  |
| (4.5)  Greetings, Amay ! I found your item, "Empty Vessel" , in Random Reviews and decided to review it.  First of all, my reviews are intended to be helpful and encouraging, not hurtful in any way. Use what you feel works for you, and leave the rest.My First Impression I liked this. You piqued my interest to keep on reading in order to find out what the potter meant by “It’s just an empty vessel.” Nice ending, too. You've written an enjoyable and satisfying piece. Punctuation/Grammar/Typos Good job! I only found one area where you might add a comma in the first paragraph: slowly moving pressing into the clay. Consider... slowly moving, pressing into the clay. Suggestions/Thoughts I did notice you have used the word that often, particularly in your third paragraph. Your writing is very clean otherwise. Many of us overuse that word and it's easy to overlook.  A simple rule I learned awhile back, is if the sentence works without it [that], you don't need it. I'll give you an example:She also knew that it took endless hours of practice Consider... She also knew it took endless hours of practice  My favorite line...But, the pottery was the medium to get others to think. And how true that is!  Nicely written! I hope my suggestions were helpful. Have a great day and... K e e p on W r i t i n g ! ~Cubby ")   My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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