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Review #4315074
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Rated: | (4.0)
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"SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP" Open in new Window.

Hello there, Newbie! Welcome to WDC. *Die4*
This is a Simply Positive Review!


*Tackg* I am also reviewing your item because it popped-up on the Random Review click.

*BowG* This was a gritty and perhaps gutsy poem about your "girl." If she were to find this little tribute to be not so flattering, I imagine she'd use those nails upon your flesh, and the results can be painful. *Laugh*

*TagB* Your poem was quick and quirky, as it only had eight lines. However, within those lines, you painted a life-sized picture of your lady. Good job in being succinct and making her truly unique in a reader's mind.


Observations

"of evry fool" [ev'ry] You need the apostrophe to replace the missing "e" in every.

*Helicopter* I don't see a rhyme pattern of any particular form poetry. However, free verse is a fine thing, too.

*Thinker* I think "U" Should be spelled out in the title, so readers will take the poem more seriously. Some may not bother to read it, thinking there are more text-speech abbreviations, because they can be distracting. *Wink*

The part I liked the best:

"what she feels
Her heart is
made of iron"

*CheckR* Thank you for not placing in the rhyme word "steel." I like how you went off the charts here and used iron. Iron is a stronger word and emphasizes the cold-darkness of her heart.

Well done! *Egg2*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 04/12/2017 @ 5:06am EDT
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