Hi History&Culture!

I am the Wordy Jay And as a fellow newbie, I know that finding your way around Writing.com (also known as WDC) can be a little intimidating at first. But never fear -- you'll soon get the hang of it!

Well, without further ado, let's celebrate your arrival on the shores of WDC with a review!


This is an interesting Christmas wish list! It is simple but goes straight to the point.


Here are some suggestions that might be helpful:


1) This is what you wrote for your description:

"I know what I want for Christmas - something we all will never have."


How about:

"- something all of us will never have."

OR

"- something none of us will ever have."



2) I think that Line 1 should not be separated from the rest of the poem, not should it be underlined. It should also end with a colon (:) instead.





3) Lines 4 and 5 contradict each other. Perhaps you might want to revise that?



4) This might make the ending of your poem more effective:





Well, that's just my 2 cents' worth! Feel free to go with what works best for you.


Write on!

Jay


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .