OVERALL SENSE: What a great love story? I feel that this could happen, especially when Jake knew his wife was dying, and he needed to get that last message to her, so she would know that he saw her crying for him on the bench. Thank goodness Sarah was able to connect with Jake, so she could pass his message on to his beloved wife. I also have a feeling that Jake was more at peace after Sarah delivered his letter. I was a little worried about Jane, the nurse, if she would read the letter; but being a friend to both Jake and Sarah, she knew immediately whose handwriting it was and Sarah even knew who the letter was from. They had a great connection that was timeless - Sarah didn't want anyone else in her life, only Jake.

         TITLE APPEAL: "Benches: In Memoriam" is the title and the description reads, "What if the person behind the name on a park bench revealed their secrets?" Interesting idea for a plot which you took and ran with it. I love the way you wrote this story.

         STYLE/VOICE: The style is Supernatural, and Romance/Love.

The voice stays with Sara as she is out, running to get her heart rate up. She feels she did good and takes a rest on a bench, where she found out that she's not alone.

         TONE/MOOD: The tone is suspenseful, Jake is straightforward about his problem, and Sarah is sympathetic to his situation.

The mood is harmonious with Sarah as she is out doing her exercise, she is grateful, and thoughtful. Jake is friendly, welcoming, and hopeful. He's happy that Sarah noticed him, most people just pass him by.

         SCENE/SETTING: The scene and setting takes place as Sarah takes her fourth and final lap around the bend of Stearn Lake of Washington Park, which is nestled in the heart of Denver, Colorado.

         CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT: Sarah is a compassionate, stay-in-shape woman who is able to see this man who died in 1973 - Jacob c. O'Reilly. Jacob's wife, Sara is now 96, is on her death bed. Jacob needs to give her a message before she dies.
Being he's not able to deliver it, he asks Sarah, the main character who sits on his memorial bench, to make sure she gets it.

Personality: Jacob is friendly, outgoing, but is sad when talking about his wife who he misses so much. He knows she misses him too, because she comes to his memorial bench and cries. This makes him sad, and he wishes someone could see him. Lo, and behold, along comes Sarah, a lady out on a run. She's compassionate, is almost in tears when she listens to Jacob talk about his wife. When she finds out he died in 1973, it's a surprise, but she still sits and listens to his story.

Motivation: Giving the letter to Sarah, Jacobs wife.- Sarah is on a mission, she believes and likes Jake. He spoke from the heart, and she now has to pass on his letter to his wife. Can she make the household believe her?

         PLOT: The sequence of events leading to the "why" things are happening makes Sarah feel unprepared on what she will find out and what she has to do when she sits on the bench to rest. It drew me into these character's lives and helped me understand the choices that were made.

Structure: Plot structure — I was introduced to the important background about the setting, dialogues seemed real, and character's thoughts - brought me into the protagonist's feelings. I felt the descriptions added to the story as well as the narration.

Conflict: I think Jake's conflict with his position made him feel trapped. He wanted to get a message to his wife, and she can't see him. Along comes another Sarah who can see him and listens to his story.- now she is conflicted in what she has to reveal to the household where Sarah, Jake's wife is lying on her death bed.

Climax: I think it's when Sarah is trying to get Jane, the nurse, to listen to her as she explains her unbelievable story. Her emotional state finally gets through to Jane, and she accepts the letter. When Jane opens it, she knows its Jake's handwriting.

Development: The story moves along at a good pace, it held my interest throughout, and became sympathetic right along with Sarah when I continued reading about Jacob's story.

GRAMMAR/SPELLING/SENTENCE STRUCTURE: I found a few errors that I will bring to your attention.

he was no where to be seen. She turned in place and looked up at the sky, shielding her eyes from the sunlight. - Nowhere should be spelled together in this sentence.

In Rememberance Of Jacob C. O'Reilly - Remembrance is spelled wrong.

She wrestled with her conscience for a moment then quietly and deliberatly tore into the envelope - Deliberately is spelled wrong.

AREAS FOR IMPROVEMENT: NONE

         LIKES: I like this sweet, wonderful couple, Jacob and Sarah, their love story is interesting to write about. Some people are meant to be together, and Jacob and Sarah are a perfect match.

         DISLIKES: NONE

FAVORITE LINE(S): I did have some favorite lines that I would like to highlight. I'll explain why I like them and how they added to the story.

          QUOTE HERE: Sarah shook her head frantically and held up her hands. "I was at Washington Park this morning. I was taking a walk and I sat down on a bench, and I talked to a man, who just appeared, and then... disappeared. I know it sounds crazy and insane, but his last words... I read the inscription, then this envelope appeared..." Sarah broke off, almost in tears. "And I kn... knew..." she stammered, "that I had to give this to Sarah." She earnestly offered the envelope once more. "Please..." she whispered imploringly.

          My Comment: Would you believe anybody if they gave this crazy explanation to you? I know I wouldn't and I wan beginning to wonder how this all was going to work out. I mean, Sarah was actually telling the nurse that she saw a ghost. I think showing her emotions was the best thing she could have done, because this helped her get her point across and the letter was delivered.

JUST MY PERSONAL OPINION: Thank you for sharing this item! I only review things that I enjoy reading and I truly did enjoy this piece.



Take care now, keep on writing, I’ll keep on reading,
Shadow Stalker🕷️ Jeannie





My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .