Hi Paige Isaac Summers !

I found your poem on the Noticing Newbies page and thought I'd take a look.

The nouns used in the first stanza are all startling when one says that one lives and rests among them and finds comfort in them: chaos, dismay, white noise, pain, danger, etc. Then we see a shift in perspective in the narrator in the second stanza when the poem moves on to quiet, solitude, peace and change. I'd suggest replacing "But Fear" with "Since Fear" as that sentence is explaining the previous one. Also, the lines that begin after a line that ends with a comma do not need to be capitalized; so "And Solitude" should read "and Solitude" etc.

Since it's mentioned in the description that this is a poem, I'd change the categorization of this item to "Poetry" instead of "Prose".

Thanks for sharing your talent with us, and keep writing!





My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .