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 Review #3791326 |
 Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! Title: Fate Author: wahidxmirzad Type: Poem Well, I don't know what the dilemma is, but it is clear that it bothered the speaker. He/she swears they didn't know, but know what? The reader has no idea. He/she then goes on to say that they are loved by themselves and that is always a good thing, within moderation. However, he/she believes that the world thinks he is wrong. About what? I've no idea again. See, to me, that is one of my issues with the poem. Throughout you speak of issues, but never one explain what they are. So I don't know if is about lost love, illness, or because your cocoa just ran out. So it is hard to weigh the emotions. Still, we know the person is hurting and the poem does end with a strong finish: A clouds formed above me it tells me it's going to rain rain inner emotion But I feel dry I'd get rid of the "A" in that first line, but the rest speaks well for how the speaker is handling the emotions by explaining that he/she will keep them in. It also contrasts how he wishes to feel and how he actually does: dry. I'd like the poem to have a hint of specificity to it, but it's good as is. 
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You responded to this review 12/01/2012 @ 3:27am EST