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 Review #3790770 |
 Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" ! Title: In the End Author: aswigart1 Type: Monologue  First Impressions: This piece seems personal, but maybe it is just fiction. I couldn’t help smile ironically at the first couple sentences: I liked you and you liked me, what was the problem? Nothing other than I had a boyfriend. Yeah, just that little detail, lol. It sounds like it was mostly intrigue though and nothing more. Neither party seemed willing to make a serious commitment to start a relationship. It is almost like the fun was in the talking about it, imagining what the relationship might be like, but that as long as you kept it at that level, no one could get hurt. There are a few spelling and grammatical issues here:  Suggestions: We wanted to give our relatioship a try,but it never happened. “relationship.” And you need a space after the comma after, “try.” I told you not to get too attached cause I didn't want you to get hurt. The word is, “because.” and wouldn't get hurt.In the end you were right Again, you need a space after punctuation.  Final Thoughts: If this is based on reality and you got hurt by this situation, of course you have my sympathy. No one deserves to be hurt. However, it did sound like a situation where someone (out of at least three people) was bound to get hurt. It’s always a gamble, especially when we engage in complicated relationships. Like I said at the beginning, this feels like a very personal piece, and I’ve tried not to delve too deeply into it out of respect and out of a sense of propriety. 
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You responded to this review 11/28/2012 @ 7:54pm EST