This was the case for a seventeen year noble noble named Johnathan./

Stained glass is used for pieces of glass glued together.

He turned to her then refixed his eyes. / I don't know whether you meant refixed to be one word, or two words or an hyphenated word, but I'm not sure that it's the best choice for what you're saying. It might be better to say something like 'then he glanced at the picture once more.

There's got to be more!, (you don't need the comma after the exclamation point.)

but explanatory tone. /I don't believe explanatory would be the correct word to use here, as he didn't explain anything to his sister, other than saying he wanted to leave the city. A different word may convey his tone better than that one.

maled / mauled
crossess /crosses

This section needs some major revision, some just need better words, or spellings, other sentences need to be adjusted.

John loved the idea of(?)angels like everything else. He wasn't familiar with most of the Bible. He was nuetralneutral about God. He felt believiing in God was more of a personel commitment. John's heart burned within like the crossess themselves. Never before had he been in this state so strongly. He fellt child-like with joy and wonder. Nothing like his curiousity had been before. I'm not sure about the last sentence. Maybe 'he realized that his curiosity had never been this strong before' ??

You have more mis-spelled words at the end, once you revise this let me know and I'd be glad to change my rating. If you take note as you work on your items, WDC has it where anything spelled incorrectly will show up with a red line underneath the word. If you right click on the word it will give you several options of a word to use. If you are way off in the spelling, then the options provided might not help.


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .



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