Hello Phoenyx!

Before I even get into the poem, there is one spelling mistake. The second to the last line were you write "Were just"
if I am correct, you are using the contraction for "We are" and if so, then it should be spelled "We're"

This poem is very unique. I don't think I have ever read a poem about the state of being which is called "Pagan". I totally agree with you that you should be treated like everyone else; being pagan should have no stigma attached to it. I did not realize that people hate pagans. That is what say in the second line. Actually, I don't think that pagans have cornered the market on hatred. It depends where you come from, who you are friends with, a lot of environmental things factor into it. I'm Catholic and I know there are some people who hate me because I am Catholic. Just like I know the people next door are hated because they are black and the people across the street are Jewish. So people don't just hate pagans. I think what people hate is when you are "different". This is something that you said in your very last line. We are just different.

What would I do to improve this piece? First of all, I would take care of the spelling error right away before you forget. The other suggestion I have is with the third line where you write, "We are people like you", if it were my piece, I would write it as "We are people just like you." Using the word "just" brings it to a more personal level. Not only that, but in your very last line, you write, "We're just different." So I think it would be great if those two lines coordinated, so to speak.

Otherwise, I thought it was a good read.

Thank you for allowing me to review your work. I consider it an honor and a privilege.

Review submitted by an Author's Spotlight Reviewer for "Invalid Item" !!


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