SugarCube's Insomniac Asylum

#1
That is the vilest, most noxious, libelous thing I've ever read. You must be a political speechwriter. Let me untie you and pull the gag out of your mouth while you tell me how you got yourself in this predicament.

#2
Harry? Harry! You've got to read what I found. It is a poison letter from the dead letter office. It looks like it has your name on it. This will kill you.

#3
I don't know why. You tell me. Why would an anonymous donor send me a million tax-free dollars? Yeah. No strings attached. Well, there is one thing I gotta' do to earn each month's installment of cash over a year and only you would believe what that is.