Erotica Harem

Dear Most Lovely Dragon,

First, you are very welcome!

You wrote:
I know from your review you'd like a description of time and place. This is a fantasy, so it's a fantasy world. Think medieval, simpler times. Swords and sorcery. Dragons.
Ah, I see. That HELPS. LOVE Dragons!

I can remove some of the firelight reference at the beginning I was trying to set mood or something.
The last ref., for me, was a bit over. I think if u remove one, it'll be great. Remember, I'm not perfect, despite the common belief of it. SMIRK.

I see that you felt you weren't really into my pov character. I felt that too. Darien really failed to come to me at first, he was a hard character to get to know, if that makes sense.
Oh, yes! Been there.

I had though of starting where Darien and his men capture the girls at least at the point where they are in Darien's custody and that's when the strong witch actually hits him. What do you think? Ideas?

Yes, I think starting there would help; show his emotions; inner turmoil. Let the reader wonder why he's with the cruel guy...

A pyre is a pile or heap of wood or other combustible material. So no it's not a fire, yet. In this case a thick pole is jutting up out of the pile of wood so that the girls can be tied to it. The fire burning close is to light the pyre and so that they can see. Does that clear that up?
It's clear from your writing that's what you meant. It just conflicts w/ the definition I grew up with and what Thesaurus.com defines it. Remind me, are you in the UK or country other than USA? Regionalism plays a big part in this stuff. Last year we had quite the discussion on it, mostly between Max & I on verbiage.

Sincerely,
David