WDC Frontliners Novel Review forum

Title: "Invalid Item" 

Chapter: "Invalid Entry" 
&
"Invalid Entry" 

Author: golefighter3

Plot: Prologue- Now, although this doesn’t have its own plot, it sets the mood for the novel. I think, in my opinion, that this prologue does just that. I wanted to read more to see what it was about and I enjoyed the beginning plot.
Ch. 1 – I’ve learned a lot about the term chapter: everybody had their own definitions how it and how it use them in their novels. If this was my novel (and this isn’t really a suggestion, just to point things out) I would have and the book laid out differently (except the prologue, I love that!) Just because my ‘definition’ of chapter is different than yours, so although I like this chapter anyway, the layout is my only problem.

Style and Voice: Prologue- This was meant to be spoken as it was – to the audience. Did you know that’s how Shakespeare wrote some of his plays in monologues (like Viola’s monologue in Twelfth Night Scene 2 Act 2)? This chapter spoken out like that is proper for it.
Ch. 1- I like how it’s done, especially with the dark and mysterious character in the background detailing the main character for the readers. Now I did read some of the second chapter and I would like to comment that in some of your main character, Chris, talks straight to us. My dad wrote a novel (Dangerous Games) and wrote in a similar style that you are. Sometimes I feel it’s too direct and it’ll take me out of the story. But that’s only my opinion.
Overall it’s a great piece and I would like to read some more sometime.


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