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Taking Pride
Chapter 2
Devon

PLOT: The plot continues to develop. There is conflict not only between husband and wife, but wife, neighbors, and family.

CHARACTERS: The characters become clearer. It appears that Herman's dairy family is a bit of a local, pushy aristocracy.

Grammar: I happily saw that this chapter used more active verbs; also, sentence structure seemed a bit more varied.

Two Things: 1. "I had the guys spread manure and wor Sofie had witnessed the extra work that Mies had to do yesterday when she gathered up the laundry from the line and washed everything again k it right into the ground." What are "wor" and "k?"


2. "Mies seemed to be quite aware at to what she was up against." Did you mean to use "at to?"

STYLE AND VOICE: Straightforward and clear on both counts.

SETTING: The author uses the senses to provide the reader with a "view" of the setting that is more detailed and immediate. "As Sofie entered the house, it was fragrant with the smell of lavender and polished wood. On the sideboard, a jar of orange-blossom had been left open. The aroma meat and onions roasting wafted down from the kitchen. Mies was preparing a meal." Good.

OVERALL: The novel is developing. This chapters suggests that Sofie's choice in marriage may not have been a wise one.