Erotica Harem

Jezz - This is so interesting... A study in gender differences. Recall that when I reviewed your chapter, I commented that these guys were all after her. I happened upon Pat's review of the chapter, and she didn't seem to pick up on what I saw at all. She saw it exactly as you intended it to be seen, a young woman surrounded by a bunch of platonic-friend guys ready to defend her.

It must be a gender thing, because my vision of the situatin was so clear and utterly opposite. Speaking as a guy, I can most solemnly swear that these guys may have behaved platonically, but that's only because they were gentlemen, successfully fighting their lower urges. I assure you that every one of them fantasized about all sorts of strikingly non-platonic activities with her, and she was one false impression away from landing in a very awkward situation.

So maybe you are fine the way it is as long as your target audience is women. Men, though, will see it quite differently, especially when that one guy plants an uninvited kiss on her lips and then jumps on top of her in bed, without her reacting with a scream and a rude slap.

Gee, I guess men and women really ARE different. :)

TimM